i've been lying to myself.
Mood= Confued...
Song= Frankie J - Don't Wanna Try
Just a few minutes ago, i was listening to BBMak's Back here.. my playlist is on shuffle so it came on ramdomly. Just at that same moment I was reading a few or too much things from the past. It's funny as I was drowning myself reading them. I don't know why I was reading them.. maybe cause I just thinking and I was so sick of doing my work so I decided to just.. read. Then I was reading to waaaay back til like this time last year, I thought about everything you went through, everything I went through and everything we both went through. Some very depressing ones and some that made me smile in an instant. Then I thought about now.. how we are.. how we're talking like how we only have 5 minutes a day to talk and in those 5 precious minutes, we have so many things to say but nothing comes out. It's been nearly 2 months now.. and I've been pretending all along.
In this 2 months, I've had countless of people trying to snatch the necklace off my neck. Dear friends, I know you're doing all this because you don't wanna see me in this state, sorry to tell you but I am in this state and it is my decision when it will come out or not. Even if I do take it out now, I'll be lying to myself and everybody else.. and in a way, this is holding me back.
I've started missing you a lot.. ... ...... ... .... .... .... but I do not bleed like I used to. I don't cry anymore, I don't call ge up just to tel him that I miss you, I pretend to be a lot happier now, I pretend that I'm over you when I complain so much about you to ge.
I know that one day i will give up. Now.. I'm confused if I have or not...
Song= Frankie J - Don't Wanna Try
Just a few minutes ago, i was listening to BBMak's Back here.. my playlist is on shuffle so it came on ramdomly. Just at that same moment I was reading a few or too much things from the past. It's funny as I was drowning myself reading them. I don't know why I was reading them.. maybe cause I just thinking and I was so sick of doing my work so I decided to just.. read. Then I was reading to waaaay back til like this time last year, I thought about everything you went through, everything I went through and everything we both went through. Some very depressing ones and some that made me smile in an instant. Then I thought about now.. how we are.. how we're talking like how we only have 5 minutes a day to talk and in those 5 precious minutes, we have so many things to say but nothing comes out. It's been nearly 2 months now.. and I've been pretending all along.
In this 2 months, I've had countless of people trying to snatch the necklace off my neck. Dear friends, I know you're doing all this because you don't wanna see me in this state, sorry to tell you but I am in this state and it is my decision when it will come out or not. Even if I do take it out now, I'll be lying to myself and everybody else.. and in a way, this is holding me back.
I've started missing you a lot.. ... ...... ... .... .... .... but I do not bleed like I used to. I don't cry anymore, I don't call ge up just to tel him that I miss you, I pretend to be a lot happier now, I pretend that I'm over you when I complain so much about you to ge.
I know that one day i will give up. Now.. I'm confused if I have or not...
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