Mood= Grumpy
Song= Nelly ft. Christina Aguilera - Tilt Ya Head Back.

This is what I felt.. at 3 in the afternoon.
--
Who is she to you?

This is what I felt.. at 6 in the evening.
--
One more time... but one more mistake and that's it..
That's when I'll be ending my chapter with you.

You've become me.. and I've become you.

This is how I will feel.. in the future.
--
[Don't wanna try don't wanna try no more.]

.
.
.
.
.
.

I'm such a liar.. I knew that there will never be ''the last'' about him.

Back to me.

Mood = Happy (for some reason i don't know why)
Song = J-Kown - Tipsy

For a fact, I know that i'll want you back...

But just not now.

I did want you back, until,

I became nothing.

Mood = Pissed
Song = Steady & co. - Only Holy Story

i'm living in the shadow of someone else's dream.

Sorry.

Mood = upset
Song = All Star United - Torn

First.. I moved to a livejournal account cause this was pissing me off but now I'm back here again. I'm yet to decide where to write all these though... mmm..

Anyways, it's not that I haven't been lazy by not writing much in here, just that my internet was down and I only just got it back recently and after i got it back.. yeah.. i was too lazy to write in here.

I realised all i used to write about was about.. him, him and him. about times were i just love him to bits, other times were i'll be so upset about him and other times just.. wanting him back. so this will be my last.

Just to clear some things up.. i just wanna say. Sorry. sorry i'm not perfect (sadly not anywhere near close). sorry i don't show enough care or concern although i know i care alot about you.. i just don't show it right. sorry that i'm usually never there for you, i dont think that you'll ever understand why. sorry that i'm always late, blame it on the freaking 2 hour jams. sorry that i'm incapable of making you happy or smile just like that, i'm not exactly a very cheery person like your other friends. i'm sorry that you had to put up with me for 5 months. and finally, i'm sorry that i never showed you that i loved you.. but i know i did.. and still do. i tried to change for you, and i did. i stopped lying to you and i thought that things were finally going to be alright. this proved me wrong. you proved me wrong.

yeah we'll be friends. very awakened way of freinds. it would actaully hurt me more to loose you than not ever knowing you. maybe we were not meant to be... maybe we were... maybe we were not.. maybe we were....

and just so you think that this does not affect me in any way then i'll be more then pleased to tell you that it affected me in every way. only geo really know how big of an impact this was to me. and again, although i did mention it, no one ever thought it was going to be this way. i didn't. not like what you said to me didn't hurt.. it did. and obviously.. you don't love me. you just think you do. and if you really did, i wouldn't be writing this right now. you meant everything to me, everyone knew that i was so happy to be with you. back then, i couldn't imagine life without you, and it's funny how, this doesn't seem to bother you at all... how it doesnt seem affect you at all. hey, i am, just another girl.

whatever i just wrote doesn't matter anymore now... does it?

and good luck. =) i just want you to be happy. and i'm guessing.. the right girl for you would be..... everything that's the opposite of me.

then again, i wanna thank you, for all the good times. ill never forget them. =)

-refer to the poem a few entries back.. on the 23rd of september 2004. title, Rain.-

i'm not.....

giving up.